(application) Upcycle

[undermoonlight]

Name: Berri
Age: 30
Contact info: taiyakinonaku

Character: Atsushi Nakajima
Canon: Bungo Stray Dogs
Canon Point: Anime Episode 20 / Manga Chapter 30
CRAU, Canon AU: N/A
Character age: 18

Content Warning: Atsushi's application talks a lot about child abuse.

Why do you think they can settle in a horror setting if they’re under 18?: N/A

Canon Abilities/Powers:

- Were-Tiger( Beast Beneath the Moonlight ) Atsushi's key ability is the ability to turn into a white tiger. Normally, this ability becomes active when Atsushi is under the light of a full moon: It triggers a transformation into a full-on white tiger. The transformation can also be triggered when Atsushi is in a lot of pain or peril (when Akutagawa takes off his leg and when he nearly falls to his death, Atsushi transforms to save himself.) His tiger form is the size of a large car and described to have "two inch thick fangs." The tiger rages and is out of Atsushi's control. He's quite powerful, able to bend metal and withstand bullets. When his transformation ends, Atsushi passes out and has no recollection of what he did in his tiger form.

However, there is more to his ability now that he has better control of it. Atsushi can partially transform into his tiger form, changing only his legs or arms. This gives him enhanced speed (fast enough not to show up on security cameras,) and enhanced strength (he breaks walls of concrete.) Atsushi can also transform just his nails into claws or use his tiger tail for balance. His senses are also super humanly enhanced, from his sight to hearing to even his reflexes. Atsushi describes the fur on his arms as being able to block blades and bullets.

In order to use his ability, Atsushi needs to actively call on the Tiger for help. He cannot use his ability if he isn't willing to embrace it. This becomes a huge plot point in the Dead Apple movie, where Atsushi rejects his ability and seems to temporarily lose it. His ability seems to have ties to his psychological state. In the novels, Atsushi thinks of his ability as his rage and how he lets his rage take over. He even theorizes that abilities are tied to peoples' souls, which is why his is so specific to his psychology. But thus far, there has been no canon confirmation regarding these theories.

- Self Regeneration: Part of the Tiger's power is to heal Atsushi's wounds. In the light novels, Atsushi specifically describes his regenerative ability as 'negating' the pain. He says he isn't healing, but negating it. This further suggests a tie between his power and psychology, as he describes his good deeds as 'negating' his bad karma.

For the purposes of roleplay, and what has been canonically confirmed, we see that Atsushi can regenerate from nearly any and all kinds of damage. From healing open wounds to regenerating a missing leg, to surviving a fall from the sky and near death experiences: The Tiger can heal Atsushi from nearly all kinds of injury.

When roleplaying him, I usually give him two limiters: He can't regenerate lost blood, so will have a limit to how long he can recklessly fight, and he can obviously be killed. Atsushi also seems to push through fights partially on adrenaline, because he usually passes out after the danger passes. However, I'm open to mod input on further limiting his regeneration~!

What is their greatest negative emotion towards an object, situation, or person in their past?:

On the surface, it seems that Atsushi hates himself more than anything. He says that he believes his life has no value and that he can only gain value by helping others. Atsushi bluntly says that he hates himself in a monologue the tiger, confessing that this is the reason why he's trying so hard to save Yokohama. But what Atsushi really hates is not himself, but his childhood. Atsushi hates the abusive orphanage where he grew up and the way that he was treated. This initially manifests itself as Atsushi hating himself, because that was what he was taught to believe. In the orphanage, Atsushi was put in a broken system where he was punished simply for existing. The headmaster would tell Atsushi that no one wanted him, that he was a burden, that children without parents had no right to cry, and taught Atsushi to punish himself just as much. The headmaster even went as far as teaching Atsushi to pity his body for hosting such a troublesome soul.

Atsushi suspected that this was wrong, but there was no one there to reinforce that idea. Protesting his mistreatment only made it worse, earning more punishment and suffering. So while Atsushi's strongest negative emotion is towards his childhood and mistreatment, he currently doesn't understand that. Which leads into your second question:

How aware are they of this negative emotion, and how do they act on it in canon?:

At his current canon point, Atsushi still thinks that he needs to hate himself. He's still suffering from the brainwashing of the orphanage and doesn't understand that he is allowed to hate the orphanage.

But throughout the course of his character arc, Atsushi comes to learn that he can safely hate the orphanage. He begins to understand that what he really hated was the way the strong headmaster hurt the weak Atsushi. This is why Atsushi is obsessed with using his strength to protect the weak. It is something that he does throughout the series as a form of resisting and fighting back against the childhood that he hates so badly.

At the point I am taking him from, Atsushi is only subconsciously aware of this. He hates the orphanage, no doubt about it, but he doesn't yet understand that he was taught incorrectly. Atsushi suspects it enough to try to prove it wrong, saying "if I can save people, maybe my life will have meaning," but he's still learning to push this suspicion. His power as the WereTiger seems to be a manifestation of Atsushi's anger towards his past and there seems to be a connection between his control over the Ability and his character arc. As he currently is, Atsushi has not had the Big Brain moment of season two where he finds a way to forgive himself for being abused; This being when Akutagawa tells Atsushi to let go of his past misfortune and focus on his present day blessings. He also hasn't had the complicated moment from season three where he realizes how much he wanted revenge on his childhood, and the headmaster in particular; In that moment, the headmaster dies suddenly and Atsushi has a mental break. It's when the headmaster dies that Atsushi realizes the headmaster taught him self-loathing and that he has wanted revenge on his abuser. But with the headmaster dead, Atsushi can't fulfill the freeing act of getting revenge.

As he is right now, Atsushi still deflects hatred for his childhood onto himself instead. He tries to save others in situations like his own as a way of proving that he was mistreated. By saving those whose lives are unfortunate, Atsushi can prove to himself that even the young Atsushi of his past deserved to be saved. He hints at this when talking to Lucy, telling her that the most they can do is protect their past selves. But Atsushi still blames himself for his suffering and will act like he hates himself more than anything.

What is their greatest virtue?:

Atsushi is kind and he chooses to be kind. He has many good reasons to be more bitter and jaded than he is, but Atsushi consistently chooses to be a kind person. When someone needs something, Atsushi will do it with minimal complaint. This includes everything from carrying shopping bags for a coworker to jumping off of an airship to save his hometown. Atsushi's story is driven by him recognizing that the kind option is the harder one, but choosing to take it anyway. He rescues Kyouka, even though everyone told him to give up on her, and continues to pursue her happiness even when she gives up on herself. He believes in cooperation when he suggests the Agency and Port Mafia can work together, even though he has plenty of reason to distrust the Port Mafia. Even in his everyday life, Atsushi chooses to trust people when it is difficult and gives them the benefit of the doubt.

Of course, Atsushi's kindness may be a virtue, but it isn't perfect. It's tainted by the fact that Atsushi can be petty and that he was taught to believe "bad people" (like him,) don't deserve kind things. If you wrong Atsushi (like Akutagawa,) then you stop deserving kindness. And because it is right not to give bad people kindness, Atsushi can choose to rationalize treating those people poorly as "the right thing to do."

How aware are they of their virtue, and how do they act on it in canon?:

Other characters often tell Atsushi that his kindness is naive, foolish, and risky. So yes, he's quite aware. He has been lectured on why he should not "take others into his boat, when he can't keep himself afloat," many times. But Atsushi consistently chooses to hear that advice and struggle to keep himself and others afloat. Atsushi is aware that the kind choice is hard and that doesn't stop him from taking it.

As hinted by the phrasing, Atsushi is also choosing kindness. It may be a virtue that he sincerely has, but he isn't a saint by any means. Atsushi has the ability to choose who he shows kindness to. Just because he will be kind to nearly everyone does not mean that he will be kind to everyone. Atsushi is aware of his virtue enough to select who to extend it towards. It also leads to him being annoyingly self-righteous at times, framing himself in his mind so that he's right to be cruel to certain people.

Atsushi is also choosing kindness as a means of negating his own bad karma. Remember that negativity? This virtue is how Atsushi copes with it. Being kind and saving others by risking and sacrificing himself is a coping mechanism. Atsushi uses it to justify his existence, which he has been taught to believe is wrong and punishable. By being kind on purpose, he can prove that he is a good person and begin chipping away at what the orphanage brainwashed him into believing. So while Atsushi is usually being logical about his kind choices, weighing the risks and accepting them, he can also be incredibly stupid. Atsushi will bleed himself dry before he quits on his 'kind choices.' He's stubborn about them and will see them through, no matter what. It's a matter of deserving to live to Atsushi.

Items: N/A

Samples: Text/Video Sample
Special Notes:

Atsushi technically would not have control over his Ability in this setting. In canon, Atsushi gains control over his Ability thanks to the Agency's leader, Fukuzawa. Fukuzawa has an Ability that allows his subordinates to better control their own Abilities. Thanks to Fukuzawa, Atsushi is able to partially transform and doesn't change into a Tiger under the moonlight.

I'd like to keep his Ability control, for simplicity's sake. However, I am open to mod input. Specifically in the case of turning into a Tiger under the full moon.

Thanks for your time! Have a nice day~!